“The bare recollection of anger kindles anger.” Publilius Syrus I took a position in a different town working for a man who just happened to be managing the consolidation of sixteen offices as a side project for the general manager. This meant our small team of six got little attention. You could say he trusted us to do our jobs, but the neglect was still felt. Never more than when it was my time for a raise—we only got merit raises in this company, and then only on four days a year.
When I got a good review but no raise I asked, “Am I not achieving the goals we set?” He said I was doing a great job and that he would look into what happened. We never spoke of it again. Three months later on the day they gave raises, again I didn’t get a raise. When I confronted him he casually commented, “Well you had a salary action when you transferred here.” Barely able to hold back the tears I replied, “That was when I took a cut in pay to move to this city from the higher-paying San Francisco Bay Area.” “Oh,” he said, clearly embarrassed. I did get a raise three months later but it took much longer to recover from the financial hardship of having to pay for rent in the new city and the mortgage on my condo in the Bay Area for five months before the condo sold. Years later I did forgive and all but forgot about it. But, whenever I found myself in a setting where co-workers were complaining about their bosses, I would pull out my story knowing it would trump all their stories. But there was little joy in having the best story. Instead I would leave the group and feel as though my blood pressure was off the charts. I might even be red-faced, but I was always back in the pit of that burning angry. What had happened to my genuine forgiveness? Just telling the story—with all the vocal intonations necessary to tell a good story—exhumed the feelings I had forgiven years before. They went from “as far as the east is from the west,” to, front and center. Having others agree that I was truly unjustly treated, fueled the fires within me. I found myself back in God’s lap crying for relief from these mixed feelings, until I discovered the correlation. Uncovering the story brought back all the emotions as well, regardless of my sincere forgiveness. Are there certain people that bring out the worst in you? Is there a better way to address the situation when the conversation turns to complaining? How will you handle it differently next time? Lord, thank You for teaching me—the hard way—to not take part in the complaining of others. Amen “How blessed is the person who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, nor stand in the path of sinners, nor sit in the seat of scoffers!” Psalm 1:1 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Publilius Syrus (85–43 BC), a Latin writer of Syrian birth, best known for Sententiae, a published work of 700 moral maxims still true and quoted today: Maxim 14—Debt is the slavery of the free; Maxim 149—Many receive advice, few profit by it; Maxim 524—A rolling stone gathers no moss; Maxim 584—No man is happy who does not think himself so; Maxim 1070—I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
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“Let every heartbreak and every scar, be a picture that reminds you Who has carried you this far; ‘cause love sees farther than you ever could, in this moment Heaven's working everything for your good.” Bernie Herms, Matthew West, Randy PhillipsTomorrow I go in for surgery. Lots of people have had this surgery and encourage me that I’ll feel so much better after I recover. “You'll have a new life,” they say. But still I need to prepare for the surgery: physically, mentally, and spiritually.
My doctor’s website has a link to calming tools, which includes music, but I prefer to just listen to my favorite Christian radio station. Every song has a few words or a message that encourages me. When the song Tell Your Heart to Beat Again says, let every scar remind me Who has carried me this far, I was reminded of a minor surgery I had years ago. I tried to find the scar but it’s completely healed over. What’s left just looks like a wrinkle. But thinking about that surgery reminded me of how I felt going into surgery the first time. I was tense, being a brand new Christian at the time. I prayed to God but I don’t think I really believed in the full power of prayer. I trusted my doctor. But I was young and naively hubris, thinking I was invincible. I also remember waking up. At no time did I think, ‘Ah, this isn’t heaven, I’m still here.’ Now that I know God better I pray differently, asking for His will and trusting in His timing in my life. He knows how many hairs are on my head (although fewer now than when I was 20), and He numbers my days also. I’m not worried about not returning ‘here’ because to go to heaven would be so much more exciting. (But, I must admit, I do think about my husband, my pets, and of course I really want to finish my book and get it published for use in my husband’s and my motorcycle ministry.) So prayer is the final surrender…not anesthesia, not the surgery itself, not even signing my Advance Directive (which details who will make decisions if I’m unconscious, and what music I want played at my funeral). I am praying for God’s will for my life, but I’m also resting in these words of the song: “‘Cause love sees farther than you ever could, in this moment Heaven's working everything for your good.” Is there something in your life that’s outside your ability to control it? Do you have something that you’re holding onto instead of turning it over in prayer to God? Are you ready to trust that God is working everything for your good, because He sees farther into your future than you can? Lord, I know I’m still tense because I have a lump in my throat, so help me trust You completely and rest in Your plan for me. Work through my doctors and bring about Your will in my life. Amen “In peace I will both lie down and sleep. For You alone, O Lord, makes me dwell in safety.” Psalm 4:8 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Bernie Herms, Matthew West, Randy Phillips; songwriters of Tell Your Heart to Beat Again, recorded by Danny Gokey on his album Hope In Front Of Me. (© 2012 G650 Music, Pure Note Music, Songs Of Universal, Inc. (BMI)). "When we face the guilt that truthfully tells us, ‘You made a mistake,’ we’re freed of shame that falsely tells us, ‘You are a mistake.’” Anonymous I don’t like feeling shame. I suppose it came from when I was a kid and got punished more harshly than was necessary when I made a mistake. I frequently heard, “Shame on you,” or “You ought to be ashamed of yourself.” It made me feel small, unworthy, less than others.
I developed an arsenal of techniques to avoid the feeling of rejection that came with shame…I would change the subject, just walk away, eat something sweet, play solitaire, hide in a book, or go over to a friend’s house. I tried never to be bad, but I was always finding myself in situations where I would do something wrong. As an adult, I began to learn the difference between guilt and shame. When I first saw the movie Anne of Green Gables, one line stood out to me. Anne said, “That’s the good thing about me, I never do the same wrong thing twice.” Anne was an orphan and was never taught how to behave. So when Matilda adopted her she was often frustrated that Anne did things wrong. But, Anne learned from her mistakes. This put mistakes into a different light for me. Anne was guilty of doing something wrong, but she had nothing to be ashamed of. She wasn’t flawed, she was learning. I would like to think that as an adult I never do things wrong any longer. But that’s just not the case. I will probably be learning until the day I die. Yet it’s a relief to release the shame and realize it’s just guilt that I’m feeling. I’m not a bad person, I'm just learning how not to do something the next time. This realization has made it easier for me to apologize when I do something wrong because it's not about me being a bad person, I just used poor judgment….I’m human. And, it helps to know others are all like me—still learning. Like Gert Behanna said in her “God Is Not Dead” message delivered to a Baptist church congregation, “God said, ‘All have sinned,’ so I presume that means all of you are sinners, too.” Are you human...still learning? Are you still relying on avoidance techniques? Is there an apology you’ve been putting off because you have mistaken guilt with shame? Now, are you ready to forgive yourself and apologize? Lord, thank You for helping me learn to apologize, and to understand that my value as a person is not diminished when I make a mistake. Amen “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:23-24 (NIV) What are your thoughts? Libby "Think of the lives the Holy Spirit could touch if I just remembered to be Jesus to each one." Dr. Julie Greenwalt A few months ago I attended a national women’s conference for a Christian organization I belong to, the Christian Motorcyclists Association (CMA). Three other women in our chapter drove to Reno, Nevada, for the conference. The resorts in Reno turned out to be less expensive than hotels in California. But in a Christian organization, there were some who were not comfortable attending a Christian conference in a casino resort.
On the second day of the conference one of the speakers announced an activity, a prayer walk. It was not an ice breaker or team builder, it was an outreach. She asked us to wear our uniforms, our leather vests with a CMA patch on the back, and to go in groups of two or three down into the casino. Instructions were to walk the floor and pray, not to accost or even approach anyone but to only speak to someone who spoke to us first. (Our vests can tend to be a conversation starter.) My initial response was, “Whoa! I don’t have the gift of evangelism.” But as she explained the plan, it began to sound interesting…and then an adventure. : ) An hour later we regrouped and several women shared their amazing encounters. People were encouraged, others asked for pray and were prayed for right then. Still others wanted to know more about CMA, and others about God. I admit this was a bold move for a women’s conference. But looking back I think of all the God-ordained encounters that would not have happened if we had not done the prayer walk. And really, how different is it from encountering the people we live and work with every day? When have you last taken a walk outside your comfort zone? Are there people that need to see Jesus in you? Lord, help me remember this prayer walk the next time I think ‘I can’t do that.’ Remind me that when I can’t, You can. Amen “Therefore go…and surely I am with you always.” Matthew 28:19a, 20b (NIV) What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Dr. Julie Greenwalt is Chief Resident at the University of Florida Department of Radiation Oncology, and is the resident representative to the Christian Medical and Dental Association (CMDA). She is married to Brandon, and they are expecting their first child. “Where there is an open mind, there will always be a frontier.” Charles F. Kettering When I went into a brainstorming session at work early in my career, there was usually an idea tossed out that went against my grain. I couldn’t always articulate my discomfort, I just knew it was a bad idea…but you can’t discuss during a brainstorming session.
The effect it had on me was to withdraw, disengage from the process. I would inwardly conclude the activity was a waste of time, and then acquiesce to the general consensus without sharing my views. This was not productive because then I had to implement the new idea that I didn’t believe in, an idea that didn’t align with my values. After trained in brainstorm methodology, I realized that many sessions skipped the second step: evaluation. Evaluation is not there to limit creative ideas, it’s there to free up creative idea generation by ensuring that later each idea would be measured against the guiding principles of the task, the vision, or the organization. Every project, program or mission has guiding principles; those non-negotiable limits we live within. At work it was the company’s core values, legal restrictions, and safety regulations. At church it was our statement of faith, and those biblically-based commands and procedures (e.g. church discipline). Once trained, I led brainstorming sessions making a point to neutralize resistance. I recognized the creative person’s need for freedom of ideas, and the cautious person’s need for no compromise. We reviewed the brainstorming process, covered the purpose of each step, and then identified the guiding principles we were following. I learned that even a cautious person like me can be a great idea generator if we are secure in knowing our core values will not be compromised. And, when I had that security, I was eager to explore new frontiers. I was even more open to change, especially if it meant that more people might come to know and love God as a result. Is there something keeping you back from being open-minded in some area of your life? Is there someone you can put at ease by first acknowledging their core value concern? Are there unspoken non-negotiable guiding principles that need to be discussed...or documented? Lord, help me to be open-minded when it comes to ways of keeping the church relevant for today’s young people without compromising the core tenants of the faith. Amen “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:2 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Charles F. Kettering (1876–1958) was an American inventor, engineer, businessman, and the holder of 186 patents. He was a founder of Delco, and was head of research at General Motors from 1920 to 1947. Among his 1911 inventions is the electrical starting motor still used in automobiles today. "You will never know how many [people] your generosity of time and talent has touched. But God knows." Kay StromI asked my husband once, if he had to give up one of his ministry involvements, which would he let go of? To put this into perspective it helps to know that when I asked this question Wayne was the leader of AWANA at our church, and had been for almost thirty years. He was also the chaplain of the local chapter of the Christian Motorcyclists Association (CMA) where we ministered most weekends.
In AWANA he shared the love of God with kids. In CMA he shared the love of God with adults, many of them former veterans and others who still carried the scars and resentments of a life lived without God. His answer surprised me at first, until I learned why. He said, hands down he would never want to stop working with kids. He explained, when you impact a child’s life by leading them into a relationship with Jesus, you impact dozens—if not hundreds—of lives as a result…like the ripple effect of a pebble dropped into a pond. Now, Wayne loves to ride his Harley, but he loves to see people come to know Jesus even more. He doesn’t need to know who or how many, he just trusts that when you introduce a child to how God loves them, others will benefit also. One time I thought I was introducing my husband to the husband of a friend that lived in the next town. Before I finished, my friend’s husband said, “Mr. Worden, good to see you.” When I heard "Mr. Worden" I knew he was a former AWANA kid. It turns out he was now a youth pastor himself. No telling how many people were in his ripple effect: students, parents, siblings, teachers, classmates... I no longer feel concerned with how many people I will reach through my life's work, or what my legacy will be. I consider myself a success when I'm doing what God has called me to do. It was God that said to "go into all the world" not "report back how many lives you changed." It's a relief to understand that it's God's place to multiply the effectiveness, because I have no control over it in the first place. Do you have an area in your life where you’re concerned about your effectiveness? How do you measure your effectiveness: feedback, number of 'followers,' sales, profits, awards, recognition…? Are you ready to let go of arbitrary measures and trust God for the ripple effect? Lord, thank You that I don’t need to know ‘who or how many,’ that my efforts are never in vain when I am obedient to fulfill Your revealed will for me. Amen “Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. And there are varieties of ministries, and the same Lord. There are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons.” I Corinthians 12:4-6 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Kay Strom is an author based in Oregon who has written more than thirty books. Kay and her husband, Dan Kline, are inspirational speakers/trainers who have spoken to over 100,000 people in more than twenty countries. |
WelcomeI love the wisdom of the ages gleaned from relevant quotes. In them there is a connection to the human experience that crosses all borders. Join me as I relate my personal experiences, and link the wisdom of the quote to the Source of all wisdom: God's Word, the Bible. Enjoy, Libby Categories
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