"Nothing is so strong as gentleness, nothing is so gentle as real strength." Ralph SockmanThe hardest thing I ever did was to cancel my wedding nine days before I was to get married. I
had to contact the church, reception venue, florist, pianist, caterer, photographer, and more. I had to send cancellations to every friend and family member, to return shower gifts and explain my decision to far more people than I would have liked. But the hardest part was telling my fiancé I wouldn’t marry him. Following this I had to listen to him rage for a few hours, all the while keeping my cool and never saying an angry word in response. You see my fiancé was an alcoholic who said he had stopped drinking. At the time I didn’t know that it would take more than saying he would stop drinking in order to actually quit. I knew he had started drinking again when he started treating me badly. I asked him to stop. When he said he wouldn’t, I simply told him, “Then I can’t marry you.” No reasons, no arguments, no explanations, and I wasn’t tempted to defend my choice against his arguments. The next day I called my sister. Her first comment was, “I didn’t think you had the strength to do it.” My reply, “I didn’t do it, God did.” I had relied on Him for the courage to confront my fiancé, the strength to stick to my resolve, gentleness not to speak even one word with an attitude, and peace not to be drawn into a shouting match. After this episode, I finally understood the Serenity Prayer personally:
Is there something that you're trying to change that you can't control? Are you reluctant to take action on something within your control? Is today the day to rely on God for gentle strength? Lord, thank You for a peaceful heart to remain gentle under pressure, and the courage to rely on You for strength. “The Lord is my strength..." Exodus 15:2a What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Ralph Sockman (1889-1970) was the featured speaker on the weekly NBC radio program, National Radio Pulpit from 1928 to 1962. In 1961 Time magazine dubbed Sockman "the best Protestant preacher in the U.S.”
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“The lust for comfort, that stealthy thing that enters the house a guest, then becomes a host, and then a master.” Khalil Gibran When young I worked, went to school, and did homework. All this while trying to maintain a social life, keep my home clean, and give my puppy the attention he craved. There was no time for rest and relaxation—R&R.
When schooling ended my priorities shifted to spend more time at work. Yet I managed to carve out time to spend with friends, family, and even added a one-on-one relationship. As my work life stabilized I was now in a position to afford a nice vacation every few years. Later I again shifted priorities and was able to travel to visit friends and even be a tourist…to see the world. Time passed and I married. Home and family now claimed the majority of my free time and my disposable income. This is when I recognized R&R had become as much a part of my life as work, friends, or family. When faced with cutting back on travel I balked. I felt I had earned it—I deserved it! Travel had become “a master.” Re-positioning Travel as a luxury rather than a necessity was like giving up fresh air and sunshine! But surprisingly, the fewer trips I took, the more I enjoyed them…the more I actually rested and relaxed. Where in your life do you draw “comfort?” Has the benefit of that comfort diminished over time, requiring you to draw on it more frequently or in greater quantity? Would you consider taking time to evaluate how you have prioritized your comfort? Lord, may I learn where R&R belongs in my list of priorities, and come to appreciate the blessing all the more for it. Amen “And I will say to my soul, ‘Soul, you have many goods laid up for many years to come; take your ease, eat, drink and be merry.’ But God said to him, 'You fool! This very night your soul is required of you...'" Luke 12:19-20a What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Khalil Gibran (1883-1931) a Lebanese-American poet, essayist, artist, philosopher; best known for his books The Prophet and Jesus, The Son of Man. Gibran is the third best-selling poet of all time, behind Shakespeare and Laozi. “The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions.” Leonardo da VinciAt work I was on a project team charted to improve a process. I was the only one that worked with the process full time. The others on the team were those who benefited from the service the process provided, except one who was an expert in process improvement.
I was most familiar with the process at every level and had various ideas on ways to improve it. I was eager to test my ideas to see if they improved the service to the others. But the process improvement expert saw things differently. In the beginning I was patient. Later, when I shared my ideas, I was surprised to see the users gravitate to different ideas for improvement. My suggestions were labeled “low hanging fruit,” meaning we could implement them, but that none of them would bring about the significant improvement the users needed. I was slightly offended so I decided to stop sharing my thoughts and just sat back waiting for them to seek out my opinions. It wasn’t long before I went from ‘slightly offended’ to ‘completely embarrassed.’ The team followed the ideas of the process improvement expert and eventually generated some ground-breaking suggestions for improvement. It was then that I remembered a line from the movie What Women Want where the screenwriter, Nancy Meyers, wrote, “Two heads are better than one, and five heads are better than two.” The lesson, of course, pointed to the concept of synergy, where the more input you get from dynamic, open-minded teamwork, the better the results. In the end I led the implementation team and the team was recognized for our accomplishment. But, I also gained the realization that my initial opinions were more like anchors of same-old-way thinking than truly progressive ideas. Can you think of a time when your opinions were not willingly accepted? Were you less than cooperative when others’ opinions didn’t align with yours? What approach will you take next time to be more open-minded? Lord, thank You for sparing me from total deception, for opening my eyes to others’ opinions before I was identified as being uncooperative. Amen “…with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing forbearance to one another in love,” Ephesians 4:2 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Leonardo da Vinci (1452-1519) was an Italian painter, sculptor, inventor, architect, scientist, musician, engineer, writer, poet, historian, among other talents; he is widely considered one of the greatest painters of all time. Historians and scholars regard Leonardo as the primer example of the “Renaissance Man.” “…the Lord has a plan for your life, even amidst the pain. When you put all the hurt into His hands, He will be your Healer, your Redeemer. And, ultimately, no pain is wasted.” June Hunt Twice in my life I’ve done something that I believed was beyond hope. Both were as a result of something I said in haste. When I made a rude remark to a co-worker during our staff meeting, I shocked even myself. Did I really say that out loud?
I knew I was sitting among five people who knew I was a Christian although none of them professed any particular faith. I prayed, and asked my friends to pray, that I might find another job. I truly believed there was no chance I could every again be a witness for Christ in this office. Clearly I had just destroyed any possibility of them seeing Christ in me. But God didn’t open any doors for a job change. Instead, He laid on my heart the need to apologize to each person in the room. I thought I misunderstood; surely I only needed to apologize to Russ, the man I insulted. Again, God convicted my heart to apologize to all five of them. In defiance to my conviction I apologized to the easy ones first—the other four people in the room. They were all gracious and accepted my apology. I relied on office gossip to reach Russ before I did so he would at least be aware of why I was approaching him. But this turned out to be the one time gossip didn’t spread like wildfire. Eventually I breached the wall of my own resistance and spoke to Russ. It turned out better than I expected; he accepted my apology and we moved on. Certainly now, after doing all that God asked, a door would open for another job…but no. I remained in this office to endure the humiliation—even though after several months I was probably the only one that remembered. About a year later, Russ asked if I would meet him in the cafeteria at lunch. I could not have been more shocked to learn he had asked Christ to be his Lord and Savior. I was humbled to learn that God had used my apology as one of the things that caused Russ to pursue the truth—was Christ really who He claimed to be. Today I look back at this episode and don’t even remember the pain of humiliation. All I remember now is, I will see a new brother in heaven someday. And, since then, his wife and two children have also come to Christ and are growing in their relationship with Him. Is there some guilty pain that feels impossible to bear? Are you sure there is no way for your pain to be redeemed? Will you trust God that doing the right thing—even if it means apologizing—will not be wasted? Lord, thank You for turning even my most embarrassing mistakes into a treasured memory; and thank You for not wasting my pain. Amen “Create in me a clean heart, O God…and sustain me with a willing spirit. Then I will teach transgressors Thy ways, and sinners will be converted to Thee.” Psalm 51: 10a, 12b-13 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: June Hunt (1944- ) is an American writer, psychologist and founder of Hope for the Heart Ministries which reaches international audiences with hopeful encouragement. “Hope is the only good thing that Disillusion respects.” Marquis de VauvenarguesAs a teenager I had more than one crush. Each time I liked a guy and we later broke up I was devastated. I thought I could never again be as happy as I was with him. I could not imagine ever liking anyone else – I was disillusioned.
Well-meaning friends and family said things like, “He’ll be sorry,” or, “His loss,” or, “He doesn’t deserve you;” but I couldn’t envision it. They would also say, “You’ll get over him,” or, “In a couple of weeks you’ll feel better.” Even though all these things might be true, they didn’t make me feel better. One thing did cheer me up, though. It was different because it gave me hope. My grandmother told me, “You are bright, attractive and fun to be around. Just give it some time.” This was the only comment that was encouraging; the only one that overcame the cloud of disillusion and allowed me to hope for a better future. It cheered me up, but it also made me want to stop moping and get back to being ‘fun to be around.’ Can you remember a time that you hurt so much you never thought you would recover? Did the words of others help? Now that you understand a bit more, when someone you know goes through a hurtful time what will you say to encourage them? Most importantly, who will you turn to for encouragement when you are disillusioned the next time? Lord, because of Your Son I have hope for all the problems I face today. Thank You for giving me such hope for today and the future. Amen “…tribulation brings about perseverance, and perseverance proven character, and proven character hope; and hope does not disappoint…” Romans 5: 3b-5a What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Luc de Clapiers, marquis de Vauvenargues (1715-1747) was a French writer, better known as a friend of Voltari, the French philosopher-humorist. The marquis’ published works did not become well known until the late 18th century, fifty years after his death. “A straight path never leads anywhere except to the objective.” Andre GideI had a project plan for my wedding, complete with timeline, Gantt chart, and issues list, but that didn’t prevent the unplanned failed wedding dress ten days before the wedding. A good wedding plan has room for surprises like people who show up that didn’t send in their RSVP. But a failed dress days before, I didn’t have a ‘plan B’ for that.
In the beginning my husband and I talked about a simple wedding, less expensive than the ‘average’ wedding price tag that we'd heard about. Rather than a fortune on a fancy cake, we had three sheet cakes, one with a special message from him to me and another with a message from me to him. The third had an image with our theme verse. I will admit the dress had gone a bit beyond simple. It started with just a little more, then headed down the road of extravagance. So when I had ten days to come up with a new dress, it turned out to be just what I had originally wanted - simple - and a lot cheaper, too. The dress scenario was the detour that got our simple wedding back on track. It was the detour that showed me how to turn over our wedding plans to God. And what I learned from it about payer and God’s grace helped a lot in that first year of marriage when there were so many changes in our lives. But, the detour is where I grew. It's when I learned. It's how I came to walk closer with God. It’s where I discovered how to better approach the many detours between “I do” and “happy ever after.” And, every detour I’ve faced has been different, so I’m still learning. Has you path always been straight? Have those detours been difficult? Is there another way to view those detours now? How will you respond to your next detour? Lord, thank You for giving me eyes to see that the detours are equally as valuable as the objective...and also, for all I’ve learned along the way. Amen “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare not for calamity, to give you a future and a hope.’” Jeremiah 29:11 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Andre’ Paul Guillaume Gide (1869-1951) was a French writer and winner of the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1947 for his works in which human conditions were presented with “a fearless love of truth and keen psychological insight.”
I sat in a group of singles from my church group—many divorced—where one woman declared, “Just like a man!” and stormed out.
The movie we were watching was Sarah Plain and Tall, a Hallmark classic of a mail-order bride story. A woman answers an ad on condition that there is some hope of a relationship before committing. Toward the end the man realizes he never had a chance to grieve his wife’s death, and leaves the house. It’s the turning point of the movie, but a few women get up and leave, sneering and grumbling as they go. What happened to make them so cynical? Broken relationships? Possibly. You could say my pet peeve is male bashing. There is so much of it…even in the church today. But thinking all men are insensitive, because they don’t respond as a woman might, is just wrong. Do we really believe God made a mistake when he made the average man less expressive than women? Elizabeth Elliott uses Gertrude Behanna’s quote in her book Let Me Be A Woman. It’s a book of collected letters she wrote to her daughter Valerie before she married. Elliott says to her daughter, “It’s hard for you to imagine this early in the game, but some day you may think (or even say aloud), “I’m not sure my husband understands me.” You are probably right. He doesn’t. He’s a man. You’re a woman. Is it any different when a woman feel misunderstood than when men get frustrated with a woman who doesn’t say what she means. Listen to this interchange and appreciate how a man might get frustrated. “Are you crying?” he asks. “No,” she replies, sniffling. “Come on now; you’re crying!” “No, I’m not.” “What’s wrong?” he asks. “Nothing!” When I said to a man, “A penny for your thoughts,” he just said he’s not thinking of anything. How can that be? I used to think he just didn’t want to share it with me, or that he was hiding something. “You have to be thinking about something!” I’d say. But in all our conversations I’ve learned, he isn’t thinking about anything. Men can do that apparently. It’s completely not in my wheelhouse. Elliott goes on to say to her daughter, “They are men, they act like men, they do what is expected of men and thus they do the unexpected…Know that there are things that make him different from you; his masculinity will help to explain some of them…Leave room for mystery.” Is there a time when you were completely frustrated by something someone did that you didn’t understand? Can you think of a time when you were angry when someone didn’t take the time to try to understand you? How will you respond differently next time? Lord, I don’t think You made any mistakes when you created men; may I grow to appreciate the differences. Help me seek to understand and honor You by honoring men. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5, 6 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Gertrude Behanna, 1900-1970, was a wealthy, wild-living, alcoholic American woman writer who found Christ and sobriety at age 53. Before her death, Gertrude became something of a legend as a speaker for Alcoholics Anonymous. Her God Is Not Dead! speech is still available on audio CD through Amazon. |
WelcomeI love the wisdom of the ages gleaned from relevant quotes. In them there is a connection to the human experience that crosses all borders. Join me as I relate my personal experiences, and link the wisdom of the quote to the Source of all wisdom: God's Word, the Bible. Enjoy, Libby Categories
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