“As much as you want to plan your life, it has a way of surprising you with unexpected things that will make you happier than you originally planned.” UnknownI stood in the doorway in my pajamas wondering what my hair looked like. What a way to greet my daughter-in-law for the first time since their wedding day.
Yet, through all my surprise - and an understandable amount of embarrassment - they were just as gracious and happy to see us as we were to see them. Instantly bed-head, no makeup, pajamas, and even a few specks of lint on the rug all melted from my mind and diminished in my importance. In retrospect, the unexpected 'casual' greeting set the tone for a familiar, relaxed visit for the whole weekend, and we had an especially memorable time with lots of laughs, great conversation, and plenty of picture-taking.
What are your thoughts? Libby
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“My mantra is, ‘I have to change the way I think in order to change the way I feel.’” Robin Roberts
The fact that I was the last person I knew to get a microwave, an answering machine, and I still don’t use the DVR, can sometimes make me feel like a Luddite. When we upgraded our WiFi, I procrastinated installing it only to discover it was plug-and-play. Recently I gave in and set up a wireless speaker linking it to my phone, and was shocked at how easy it turned out to be.
I suppose it’s time to stop thinking disparaging thoughts about my abilities – even though I choose not to use a DVR - and admit what I know. I need to be encouraging toward myself in the same way I encourage others: ‘We all excel at something,’ I tell them. Is there a skill set where you don’t care to be the expert? Do you find you are harder on yourself than on others? How will you cut yourself some slack and give yourself positive affirmations? Lord, thank You for making me an individual with a unique combination of skills and abilities, so I have no room to compare myself to others. Amen “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” Psalm 139:14
“Other people always seemed better than me – more confident, more at ease…I only knew how I felt and how others looked.” Anonymous
As I came to meet and know their parents I quickly learned there was another single woman on the block struggling to raise her daughter without child support, a family down the street had a son with a serious illness, and my next door neighbors were filing for divorce. Although not happy to learn of other’s misfortunes, I was able to join in pray for the single mother, little boy who was ill, and the three young kids next door as their parents struggled in their relationship. But, in addition, I learned to be grateful for my problems that were nowhere near as serious as others. Now I’m learning that comparing my insides to other's outsides can be deceiving. It’s natural to want to hold our lives in place for bystanders, or even casual acquaintances, by using a sort of hairspray for our outsides. But on the inside we all have things we’re dealing with.
Are you envious of others who seem to have it all together? Does your life look dismal by comparison? What can you do today to curb the desire to compare and be grateful for life’s challenges? Lord, thank You for the challenges I have and the help you offer to face them anew each day. Amen “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so you can endure it.” I Corinthians 10:13 What are your thoughts? Libby “If you’re fighting your problems, you’re already on the losing side.” Canon GlennonYears ago I tried the liquid protein diet (and almost died), but I did lose a lot of weight in just six days. So much in fact that none of my jeans fit any longer. But the worst of this experience was a rumor that started about me...that I had an abortion.
But, a good friend advised me, “Only a guilty person needs to defend themselves. Give it time and the truth will become known.” Waiting was excruciating. I asked for prayer, "Please pray for peace in the midst of the storm." Before long I began to feel at peace. God’s comfort settled over me like a warm blanket on a chilly night. I no longer fought the illusive, intangible problem that had no reasonable solution. Are you fighting a ghost of a problem?...Twitter, Facebook, etc.? Do you long to defend your innocence? What will you do differently today to switch to the 'winning side'? Lord, the cares of this world are many; help me remember to bring them to You and trust that You have a better solution than anything I could devise. Amen “Do not be afraid or discouraged…for the battle is not yours, but God’s.” II Chronicles 20:15 What are your thoughts? Libby
“The Big Book says that if you’ve forgotten your last binge, you haven’t had it yet.” Anonymous
I rationalized that I had collected them, so I was going to enjoy them. The problem was, eating so many treats in one evening made all the flavors meld, like putting six different salad dressings on your salad at the same time. As a result, nothing stood out as special…nothing even tasted good. Looking back it reminds me of the misnomer: if a little salt tastes good, then a lot of salt will make it taste better. Wrong! I hope I never forget how unsatisfying it was to eat so many sweet and savory treats and enjoy nothing. The more I ate the worse it got. But I continued to eat until all the gourmet items were gone and I was way beyond full. Are you buying-in to the misnomer that the more you indulge the more fun you’ll have? Do you have a memory you can resurrect of a past binge that reminds you why you don’t want to go there again? What will you do differently today to ensure you don’t have to add a new binge to your list of unpleasant memories? Lord, may I never forget how miserable I was having eaten so much food with no pleasure in return. Amen “Do not be deceived:…for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.” Galatians 6:7 BUT, ALSO “Do not fear for I am with you, do not anxiously look about you for I am your God; I will strengthen you, surely help you, surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10 PS For those struggling with addiction, there are over 30 12-step programs (see below). However, for more immediate help, pray – don’t just recite, pray – the Serenity Prayer. It has always worked for me. God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference. Amen A Partial List of 12-Step Groups
For a full list of 12-step programs and support groups patterned after 12-step principles, refer to the Wikipedia article: List of Twelve-Step Groups. “Hope is something you can work at. You can put it on the menu, you can dish it out, you can consume it whole.” Sean CummingsSean Cummings was diagnosed with chronic COPD, likely contracted innocently inhaling powdered cement when he was a tile setter in his youth. So when I had a back injury as a result of a rear-end car accident, I knew I needed to engage Hope to replace the emotions I was struggling with. Sean’s example of learning to live with COPD (Breath of Life, Guideposts, November 2018) by adjusting his lifestyle, challenged me to learn to make the necessary adjustments to live with a bad back until I fully recover, or possibly for the rest of my life, as happens with many people injured later in life. Are you fighting circumstances that just happened to you? Do you find yourself defending your position as the innocent victim? How will you engage Hope in your life today? Lord, thank You for the Hope that one day all pain will be gone and all tears dried when we spend eternity in the next life. Amen “…we exult in our trials knowing that trials bring about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint…” Romans 5:3 to 5
“Some people won’t love you, no matter what you do. Some people won’t stop loving you, no matter what. Go where the love is.” Eleanor Brown
I still had to work with her but I chose not to socialize with her. I suppose she interpreted it as being stuck-up or self-righteous, but it was more important for me to take care of myself and remain neutral toward her. Being new in town and knowing few people, testing the waters as I tried to make new friends was my way of being careful to befriend only people that were encouraging, friendly, and kind. We enjoyed our time together that day. Although, I didn’t regret the self-protection choices I took twenty years earlier, I may always wonder if we could have been friends sooner if I had not been so ‘neutral’ and avoided her. I discovered sometimes rather than look for Love, in order to "go where the lover is" I need to be the one to take Love with me. “Where Love Is, There God Is” Leo Tolstoy Are you in a situation where you are enduring rather than flourishing? Are you able to be kind even when others are not kind to you? What will you do this holiday season to “go where the love is” by taking Love with you? Lord, help me get better at being a peace-maker and loving others who are not necessarily friendly toward me. Amen “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” Matthew 5:44 What are your thoughts? Libby Note: Eleanor Brown (1973- ), novelist, anthologist, editor, teacher, and motivational speaker. She is the New Your Times and international bestselling author of novels The Weird Sisters and The Lights of Paris.
“Four saying that lead to wisdom: 1) ‘I was wrong,’ 2) ‘I’m sorry,’ 3) ‘I don’t know,’ and 4) ‘I need help.’” Louise PennyGetting out of my car I noticed a woman running up to me, yelling. I reacted to her screaming thinking: Is she some kind of a nut? But then I listened. She was livid that I had cruised through the parking lot about twenty-five miles an hour.
I walked up to the open door and said, “I’m the one. I sped through the parking lot.” I went on to try to explain that I would never intentionally put kids at risk. I apologized, multiple times, before we finished talking. Later the school secretary approached me and thanked me for the way I handled it. I felt I had apologized, so I had done all I could do, all I was responsible to do…but I still felt badly. Later, thinking it through for the hundredth time, it occurred to me: I said I would never do anything to put children at risk….but I had done just that. She was right in her assessment.
Have you ever been annoyed when someone points out something you did that was uncharacteristic of you, but still the wrong thing to have done? Did you ever apologize and still not feel relieved of the guilt? If given a do-over, how would you have handled it?...or how will you handle it next time? Lord, thank You for the message that got me back on track – keeping kids’ safety paramount – even though the reminder came to me through a screaming mother and a guilt-trip. I’m grateful You got my attention before I actually injured an innocent child. Amen “For we aim at what is honorable not only in the Lord’s sight but also in the sight of man.” II Corinthians 8:21
“Maybe now is the time to offer a true sacrifice of thanksgiving, trusting that God has allowed even the worst circumstances for His unseen purposes.” Juli Slattery
The clock registered 11:20. God had answered the prayer "please take him this morning" that I’d prayed when watching him struggle for a breath. I stood, paced the room, sat on the floor, and through my tears thanked God for answering my prayer...taking Dad while still morning.
Have you had a crisis this year that you wouldn’t think could be God ordained? Can you find something to be thankful for even in the difficult times? As we approach Thanksgiving, what can you thank God for this year?
What are your thoughts?
Libby Note: Juli Slattery (19??- ), an American clinical psychologist, author, speaker, and broadcast media professional who co-hosted Focus on the Family from 2010 to 2012; she co-founded Authentic Intimacy and is the co-author of Passion Pursuit: What Kind of Lover Are You Making?, Finding the Hero In Your Husband, Beyond the Masquerade, and Guilt Free Motherhood. “It was then I learned that gratitude is the best feeling I would ever have…it is perhaps the genesis of all other really good feelings in the human repertoire.” Lewis Smedes, after almost dying
So when an acquaintance suggested I begin to keep a ‘gratitude journal’ writing at least three things I’m grateful for at the end of each day, I topped each page with: “What I learned today was…”
Or I’d think how my social life was virtually non-existent. Then I’d write, “What I’m learning is…my one year old puppy is calmer and less likely to misbehave when I spend more time with him.” After several weeks of choosing to look for the gratitude in each day, I went from what I called was a ‘half-empty’ perspective to a ‘half-full’ perspective. My life hadn’t changed much in that time, but I found myself less depressed and enjoying my days more. Do the unfortunate parts of your day come to mind first? Is your glass half-empty as opposed to half-full? How will you alter your perspective and enjoy the blessings of a grateful heart?
What are your thoughts? Libby
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WelcomeI love the wisdom of the ages gleaned from relevant quotes. In them there is a connection to the human experience that crosses all borders. Join me as I relate my personal experiences, and link the wisdom of the quote to the Source of all wisdom: God's Word, the Bible. Enjoy, Libby Categories
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